The Father’s Day gifts your Dad doesn’t want

By Ellyn Peratikou

With Father’s Day fast approaching, we’re sure panic is starting to set in for some of you. When you were young it seemed so easy. All it took was a macaroni picture or a paper mache hat to make him happy. Now, we are not by any means saying that you have to go out and buy a new car for your old man to put a smile on his face, but be a bit more thoughtful with your gifts. We promise he’ll appreciate it!

Here’s a list of the Father’s Day gifts your Dad doesn’t want to receive, and you should avoid these at all costs if you still want him to love you afterwards…

1) Any novelty items

Whether it be clothing or general jokey gifts. What do you have when the 3.5 second-long joke wears off? A doorstop (or mustache mug, hip flask shaped as a cassette tape) that will live in a landfill forever.

2) Anything with the words ‘Worlds Best Dad’ on it.

Who are you trying to fool? You’re far better off actually telling the truth and purchasing a t-shirt that says ‘Worlds Okay-ish Dad’ – at least that way he’ll know you’re being honest. Lets face it, the only acceptable occasion for wearing such clothing is Father’s Day – after that it’s going straight to the back of the wardrobe. So it’s pretty much pointless.

3) A mug

You got away with this when you were three and your mum had a photo of you and your dad printed onto a mug. But 20 years and 20 mugs later, enough is enough. Nothing says I don’t know what to get you more than a mug–especially a World’s Best Dad mug.

4) Useless gadgets

You know what we’re talking about, the iPod toilet paper dock, the bird box radio or the digital food thermometer. Although they may seem cool, (it’s an iPod dock for your toilet paper!) but is your Dad going to make use of them? Similarly, if your Dad is a bit of a technophobe, he might not appreciate it as much as you’d hoped.

5) ‘Of the month’ clubs

Let’s be honest, there’s nothing you need THAT often. Whether it be fruit/fish/seed/vegetable/beer – I promise you this, your Dad wont want it turning up on his doorstep every month for an entire year.

6) A coupon

IOU’s and coupons are famously awful Father’s Day gifts, especially when, a couple of months earlier he watched you bring your mother breakfast in bed, hand her a beautiful bouquet of flowers and her favourite perfume. A coupon for a month of car washes just isn’t going to cut it!

7) Soap on a rope/Any Hygiene kit

There are plenty of ways to say ‘I Love You, Dad’. Soap on a rope is not one of them. Nose and ear hair clippers also fall under this category. If it’s telling him he needs/a wash/a shave/a makeover – chances are he won’t be very interested.

8) The Tie

Ah the tie. A Father’s Day classic. Ask yourself, does Dad need another tie? Probably not. And even if he needs one, I’m going to let you in on a secret. He doesn’t want one for Father’s Day. A tie for a Father’s Day gift is the equivalent of an iron for a Mother’s Day gift. (Unless you wanted an iron. And if you did, we need to talk.) Just say no to the tie.

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